Jake was only four years old when I met him. Duane told me about his one night stand with this woman. He told me how she stalked him for months and months until she found him drunk enough to sleep with her. Shame on them both. I don't find her totally at fault for the situation, because it takes two to tango.. so to speak. However, I do hold her totally responsible for the fiasco that followed. Her inability to understand and ACCEPT that Duane didn't want a relationship with her, even after finding out she was pregnant.. well, honestly, what did she expect? Rather than allow Jacob to have many people care and love him was against her ability apparently. She hated that I was involved with Jake's dad. I could understand that more if say, they had been married and I had been the other woman.. but that isn't what happened. They never even dated really... a one night stand, her continually stalking him doesn't add up to a great beginning does it? Anyway, it doesn't really matter now does it? The result was a little boy who needed BOTH parents in his life. Unfortunately, she didn't see it that way. And it took many years, thousands upon thousands of dollars, numerous attorneys, counselors, doctors, court hearings and eventually a case manager who saw through her bull shit that allowed a young boy to finally spend time with his father.
The crap "I" went through was probably worse than what my husband went through. However, I know I didn't endure anything close to what my stepson endured. The emotional abuse she bestowed upon him was .. well, unfathonable.
Let me give you just one little example: Once Duane finally got a court order that he could have overnights and regular weekends with Jake... he picked him up on that night. Then, he got called to work (he's a railroader... on call 24/7)... so, Jake was going to stay all night with me.. the wicked stepmother and Brandon, the wicked evil stepbrother. So, because Christina knew Duane may be going to work... she had a plan. Here is how it played out. p.s. Jake was FIVE years old.
Me: Time for bed boys! (tucked them both in their beds) *Bunkbeds in same room
Jake: *Boo-hoo, starts to cry.
Brandon: (snoring... asleep before his head hit the pillow)
Me: Oh honey... what's wrong (walking over, comforting Jake with a hug)
Jake: I can't sleep... I CAN'T go to sleep.
Me: Oh, sure you can... you just have to give it some time.
Jake: No... I can't. I need to go home to my mom. I HAVE to.
Jake: No... I am SUPPOSED to go home... or else... (very scared look)
Me: Oh Jake.. you are with daddy & me & Brandon this weekend... you don't want to go home already.
Jake: But I HAVE to.. you don't understand!
Me: Well, help me understand. Tell me why?
Jake: I can't. I'm not supposed to.
Me: (hmmmm) Okay... well, what would help?
Jake: Ummmm, I just can't GO TO SLEEP.
Me: Okay, you want to go watch a movie? (had 50+ disney VHS movies at that time)
Jake: Yes. (happy, smiling) Yes... I can stay awake that way... Let's watch a movie!
So... we got up, I put a movie on and we sat on the couch. I did to him just like Brandon. Little child, laid him down, head in my lap, blanket on him and I sat back and watched the movie he picked out. (honestly, can't remember which one!)
Jake: Well, this is good.
Me: Yep, good movie.
Jake: No, it's good I'm awake.
Me: How so? Why?
Jake: Because.. as long as I'm awake daddy won't die on the train!
Jake: (very matter of fact) Well, mommy told me if I went to sleep here and daddy was working, his train would wreck and he would DIE! So... I can't go to sleep!
How do you like them apples? And that is just example number 1 of 4,967. That witch actually did this to this little boy. And not only that... but hundreds (HUNDREDS) of other times she did things just as bad OR WORSE. She thought she was MOTY... but instead, she was NIGHTMARE MOTHER. How sad is that?